By Adam Dayan
Over the past 50 episodes of The Curious Incident Podcast, I have had the privilege of speaking with parents, clinicians, educators, advocates, and professionals who dedicate their lives to supporting children and families navigating special needs, mental health challenges, and educational struggles.
This episode is different. For the first time, I stepped into the guest chair.
Episode 50 is an incredibly personal conversation about my own experiences growing up with anxiety, perfectionism, and OCD and how those experiences shaped not only who I am personally, but also the philosophy behind the work we do at our firm every single day.
Hosted by my executive assistant, Kristine Champagne, this conversation explores experiences that long predated my work as an attorney: quietly struggling with anxiety as a child, channeling emotions into perfectionism and compulsive behaviors, and trying to navigate overwhelming feelings without fully understanding what was happening internally.
Listeners will hear stories I have rarely shared publicly before – repeatedly erasing an Egyptian mummy project when in the 1st grade because the letters did not feel “perfect,” to obsessively checking and adjusting my eyeglasses as a child because it gave me a temporary sense of control during moments of anxiety.
Throughout my childhood, I appeared “fine” from the outside. I did well academically, stayed focused, and worked hard. But internally, there was a very different experience unfolding — one that many children quietly experience while the adults around them may not recognize just how much they are struggling emotionally beneath the surface.
That reality has stayed with me throughout my life, and it has profoundly influenced the way I approach the work we do for families today.
More Than Legal Representation
When I started the firm in 2009, I knew I wanted to build something centered around people and meaningful connections. I was never interested in purely transactional work. I wanted to help families facing situations that felt deeply personal, emotional, and overwhelming.
At the core of our practice is a simple belief: every child deserves to be understood as a whole person. Not just academically. Not just behaviorally. Not just through test scores, diagnoses, or labels. Children are complex. They each have unique strengths, challenges, personalities, interests, anxieties, learning styles, and emotional needs. And families deserve support systems that recognize and honor that complexity.
Every meeting we have, every legal strategy we discuss, every hearing we prepare for, and every expert we collaborate with ultimately comes back to helping a child access the education and support they need to thrive.
And in this episode, Kristine and I talk openly about why that mission feels so personal to me.
Understanding Children Who Struggle Quietly
One of the themes we discuss throughout the episode is the idea that many children who are struggling emotionally may not appear outwardly distressed. Sometimes anxiety looks like perfectionism. Sometimes it looks like overachievement. Sometimes it looks like repetitive behaviors, emotional withdrawal, school refusal, or physical complaints. And sometimes children become incredibly skilled at masking what is happening internally.
There is a moment in the episode where Kristine and I discuss how easily a child adjusting their eyeglasses repeatedly could simply appear “normal” to adults around them – when in reality, it may be serving as a coping mechanism for overwhelming anxiety.
Because of my own experiences growing up, I think I carry a heightened awareness of those quieter struggles. I understand how easy it can be for children to fly under the radar while carrying emotional burdens they do not yet have the language to explain.
That understanding has deeply shaped the way I connect with families and the way our team approaches advocacy.
Why This Work Matters So Much
One of the most rewarding parts of this field is that we witness growth over time. We see children develop confidence, gain skills, build relationships, discover strengths, and access opportunities that may once have felt out of reach. We see families begin to feel less overwhelmed and more hopeful.
In the episode, I discuss one particularly impactful case involving a child with very significant needs whose educational supports had been reduced despite the serious consequences that regression could create for her wellbeing and safety. Our team fought hard to restore those services, and being able to help secure the support she needed remains one of the many moments that reaffirm why this work matters so deeply to me.
These are not simply cases. These are children, families, futures, and lives.
The Importance of Asking for Help
One very important part of this episode focuses on my experience eventually seeking therapy and receiving an OCD diagnosis after law school. For me, that experience was liberating. It allowed me to better understand what I was dealing with and begin developing healthier tools to manage anxiety instead of relying on coping mechanisms that ultimately kept me stuck.
Listeners will also hear me share a recent vulnerable moment when grief unexpectedly triggered old compulsive urges, and how that experience reinforced the importance of pausing to acknowledge the emotions underneath anxiety rather than trying to outrun them.
I think many people struggling with anxiety or OCD quietly ask themselves some version of the same question: “What is wrong with me?”
One of the most important things I hope listeners take away from this conversation is that they are not alone. There is support available. There are professionals who understand. And reaching out for help can be life changing.
Why I Created The Curious Incident Podcast
The podcast has always been about helping families feel less isolated.
We know how overwhelming this process can feel when you are trying to navigate diagnoses, evaluations, emotional struggles, educational challenges, and uncertainty about the future.
Many parents come to us exhausted. Many are carrying guilt, fear, confusion, or the pressure of trying to hold everything together for their child.
Through the podcast, I hope to provide conversations that offer clarity, perspective, encouragement, and connection – whether through expert insight, shared experiences, or simply reminding families that there are people who genuinely care and want to help.
Episode 50 is by far the most personal example of that mission yet.
This episode was not easy for me to record. Vulnerability rarely is.
But if sharing my experiences helps even one parent better understand their child, helps one person struggling quietly feel seen, or encourages someone to seek support they may have been afraid to ask for, then it was absolutely worth it.
I hope you will take the time to listen to my episode as well as the many other conversations we have shared throughout The Curious Incident Podcast. I am incredibly grateful to continue building this platform alongside the families, professionals, and listeners who have supported the podcast every step of the way.
To listen to the Full Episode follow these links, or find it on any podcast platform.
If you would like to access the transcript to the podcast you can find it here.